A.  Area of Concern“After the death of someone you love, you listen for them.  You wait for signs of reassurance, help, love, the touch, the sound of any presence.” – Joan Juliet Buck 

According to the 2005 U.S. Census Bureau, approximately 1.5 million children are living in a single-family household because of the death of one parent.  One out of every 20 children age 15 and younger will suffer the loss of one or both parents. These statistics do not account for the number of children who lose a “parental figure,” such as a grandparent or other relative who provides care.

Based on these numbers, the need for adequate support and counseling of bereaved children is critical. Unfortunately, many medical institutions, palliative care programs, and even hospice programs do not offer specialized support for children. In the Paris area there are approximately two thousand children that could benefit from this type of care.  The good news is there is growing awareness of this need. Physicians, nurse practitioners, nurses, social workers, and pastors are beginning to recognize the needs of these children.

After the death of my grandfather, I found that there were no support groups for children who were grieving in my own hometown.  Paris, Texas is a small city about 96 miles northeast of
Dallas, Texas. According to the 2000 Census, the population is 25,898.  Even though I had the support of my friends, none of them truly understood how I felt.  Now, I have a friend who calls or comes over when he is having trouble with the loss of a relative. He and I talk about how he feels and what I did when I felt the same way.  This is how I came up with the idea to help children during their time of grief.  Therefore, I went to Ed and Nancy Catlin, who run a grief ministry program for adults.  I also went to Pamela Russell LCSW, LPC, who owns
Paris Counseling Center, PA.  They agreed there is a large need for a support group for grieving children in our area. 

            B. Challenges Identified“Well it is said that there is no grief like the grief which does not speak.” – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow 

There are several challenges I have encountered while implementing the idea of Project H.E.A.L. (Helping Everybody Accept Life).  I thought of many options for projects, and I was able to decide on three possible choices.  I wrote out the pros and cons of each idea.  The one that hit my heart was a support group for children to learn to deal with grief.  The major things I had to start my project with are increased social interaction, cost effectiveness, and community based support. Shockingly I have actually gotten all of these criteria accomplished.

Since I do not have the expertise to help my peers, I found resources such as counselors, pastors, and community advisors, to assist me. I also needed to get permission from my school district,Crockett
Middle School principal, and teachers to start my project.  Having a secure and safe blog site was another of my concerns.  This blog site allows the students to log in and communicate.  Time was a great concern when I chose to start this project.  I am very active in many school activities and in Boy Scouts.  My grades are important to me, and I will do what needs to be done to keep them up.  In addition, the biggest concern is peer interest.   How can I reach my peers who need the most support? 

With all the challenges children deal with when they lose a loved one like; fear, guilt, denial, and more. The death of a loved one can make a child’s life miserable, because their life has been torn apart. There’s also a difference between age groups, young children often do not understand the situation, and it may be years before they fully understand their loss. However older children have a larger capacity to accept the situation, there by experiencing a greater loss or a deeper grief. So far the only difficulty I have had with my support group is that I have had so many children that want to participate; it is not possible to have the amount of groups that are needed to serve them all.

C.  Underlying Problem“Life is a series of experiences, each one of which makes us bigger, even though it is hard to realize this.  For the world was built to develop character, and we must learn that setbacks and griefs which we endure help us in our marching onward.” – Henry Ford 

            During the 2005 - 2006 school years, almost one out of every twenty children ages 15 and younger suffered the loss of one or both parents or a loved one.  How can Project H.E.A.L, increase the amount of support for children so that they can live a more peaceful life with themselves and others?

D.   Alternative Solution Ideas“I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge - myth is more potent than history - dreams are more powerful than facts - hope always triumphs over experience - laughter is the cure for grief - love is stronger than death.” –Robert Fulghum 

The first solution in implementing my program was to start a support group for children who have lost loved ones. This was a way to reach out and help those children at my school.  I am also hoping to get more groups in schools, and eventually in the churches and funeral homes.  I have even created seven brochures and two bookmarks with information on dealing with grief that included web sites that people can visit for more information.  There are also reference sheets for books and audio tapes in our public library.

My second solution was trying to start a protected blog, provided by my school, to help children who either do not like to talk about their personal life in front of other people or children who cannot show up to the meetings.  This blog will have information, quotes, and even ideas that were provided by counselors to help deal with the grief.

The third solution I am going to do is a podcast so that people will be able to download to an iPod or phone. This way they will have support at the touch of a finger.  My podcast will have information on grief and will be updated approximately once a week.

My final solution is to write, illustrate, and publish a children’s book on how to cope with death.  I will make enough copies for children and parents to look at in schools (in the library and counselor’s office), theCancer
Center, funeral homes, hospitals (on the cancer floor, radiology floor, and the children’s floor), nursing homes, and Hospice.

E. Plan of Action:

“Grief teaches the steadiest minds to waver” – Sophocles 

Ø  July :  Brainstorm ideas for various projects and narrow it down to three, write pros and cons for each project, identify challenges within projects, pick project close to my heart

Ø  August:  Find community support, start gathering possible ideas for project, brainstorm events for project timeline, research all aspects of project

Ø  September:  Pick name for my project, Project H.E.A.L. begins, design logo and t-shirt, set up blog-site with school, gather more information for brochures and support groups, meet with local counselor

Ø  October:  Meet with community resources, create mission statement, research the need, set up fundraisers, make brochures for events, set up, continue to work on paperwork, contact local organizations and businesses for donations, meet with school principle for project, meet with local counselor

Ø  November:  Continue contact with local organizations and businesses for donations and support, create survey for students and adults, pass out survey, set up a support group at school, meet with local counselor, finish brochures, business cards, and awareness ribbons

Ø  December: Contact resources from school for technology, meet with students in support group, make commercial and podcast, update blog site

Ø  January:  Call Mrs. Fleming for final dates for Austin, find publisher, meet with churches and funeral homes, get donations, present project to Lamar County Commissioners Court and the School board, contact The Paris News

Ø  February:  Meet with Mrs. Fleming, Kiwanis, and the Rotary Club, have another fundraiser at CICI’s Pizza, have work proof read, organize to have a booth at Kid Safe Saturday, order more t-shirts, send out a memo to a school staff to have a chance to purchase a T-shirt

Ø  March: Print more brochures for area churches, funeral homes, develop two more brochures, start more groups at school, churches, and around the community, start podcast,  have a fundraiser at Applebee’s, have a booth at Kid Safe Saturday

Ø  April:  Update blog site, make sure project is running without problems, make a resource booklet (guide) with local numbers for children to use, have monthly meetings with the pastors and other community supporters to make sure everything is going okay and if they need anything, continue to update the podcast

Ø  May: Upload my scrapbook, introduce Project H.E.A.L. to other districts in the area, create a new book with Christian beliefs for the pastors (have a meeting with all),  Look into adding all aspects of grief during the summer

Part II:  Implementation of the Plan 

A.    Actions and Outcomes to Date:  “The only cure for grief is action.” –George Henry Lewe 

The purpose of my project is to increase the amount of support for children dealing with grief due to the death of a loved one.  I established three main goals involving the school, community, and the home lives of the children grieving.

The first goal is to increase the amount of support at school for children dealing with grief by the death of a loved on.  I gathered up information by conducting a survey of the entire school body.  By passing out the survey I was able to see where the need was and how many of the students needed a support group.  Out of 541 students, 398 participated in the survey.  I have spoken to Mrs. Deborah Robbins, Crockett Middle School Counselor/Assistant Principal, to help me start support groups for students who are grieving.  I have set up a support group with the guidance of Mrs. Robbins to help my peers at school.  We have meetings once a month, which have gone well.  Everyone in the group has gotten more comfortable to talk and is feeling better about themselves.  I have spoken to Mr. Joe Watson to help me put together a commercial on the 5 stages of grief to be shown during CATV. Mr. Watson recommended that I do a podcast only, that way I am not just sitting in front of the camera and talking.  I can record my voice and anyone who needs the extra support can download the information.  He also stated that the way students pick on other students in Middle School, a podcast would be better, because he did not want the program to be hurt and felt there is a real need for Project H.E.A.L.  I will ask CATV (our school’s weekly broadcasting program) to talk about the signs of grief for children.   I have all of my copies of brochures at the school for the counselors to distribute to the students who need them.  My blog site is printed on the school newsletter website and in the brochures. I have set this up for any of the students who need to talk but do not want to come to the meetings. 

I am getting my book published and I will give a couple copies to each of the libraries in our district.  My book is written for Pre-K – 5^th graders, but I have had many adults read it.  Eventually, I would like to offer the program to other districts in our community.  I feel all the children deserve a chance to understand what they are feeling and why.  It makes no difference where I go to school, we are all equal and all have feelings.  My scrapbook will be uploaded to my blog site to be reviewed by anyone interested.

My second goal is to increase the amount of community support for children dealing with grief by the death of a loved one.  I have had to enlist the help of many community members to help me reach my goals. Therefore, I went to Ed and Nancy Catlin, who run a grief ministry program for adults.  I also went to Pamela Russell LCSW, LPC, who owns
Paris Counseling Center, PA.  They agreed there is a large need for a support group for grieving children.  Both agreed to come and be guest speakers at the support groups.  I have many supporters in the community such as the area churches likeImmanuel
Baptist
Church.  Pastor Randall Scott, stated that he would love to be able to support the project in anyway seen fit.  He has taken many programs and learned about the different stages of grief.  He is also willing to start up a support group in his area of town, to make it easily accessible for the children to attend.  He would like to purchase some books to have in his library and give to the children who need the support. Another church that has agreed to help is Faith Presbyterian Church.  Pastor John Kelley would like to see the program cover another aspect from the Christian ways.  He will open his church for any groups that are needed in the surrounding area.  My church,

My final goal is to increase the amount of home support for children dealing with grief by the death of a loved one.  I have created as well as distributed seven informational brochures with websites and hands-on activities on how to deal with grief.  I will be creating more informational brochures to give the students a better understanding of their grief.  My brochures are easy to understand.  If a child can not read the information, their parents can.  The activities are also good for adults to share with their children.  I know that I can not cure all of their feelings, but at least they can have a sense of knowledge about what they are feeling.  There are adult and child reference sheets for books and audio tapes in our public library. I have also given them my blog address on the brochure, so they can write how they feel and link into various sources of information that is convenient for them.  My family and neighbors have supported my project through fundraising, donating money, time, and volunteering to assist me with completing my dreams.  Through my booth at Kid Safe Saturday, I was able to provide information for families to use together.  I will be placing my scrapbook online and will link it to my blog site for anyone to see the progress of the program and encourage their family to open up about their feelings in their time of grief.  When the community gets involved more, I will have all the information accessible for the families to find a support group in their area that is convenient for them.

B.     Organization: “Grief,  The pain now is part of the happiness then.  That’s the deal.” – C.S. Lewis 

            Since this is an individual project there were many obstacles that I had to overcome.  I needed to make sure my project was taken seriously and that I could continue it for years to come.  Trying to get adults to believe a 6^th grader could come up with this project and getting support from the community was difficult.  When I made my point clear and started to show progress, I received generous support from different businesses and organizations.  I had to organize where I was going to start the support group and gather information for the brochures.  I needed to make sure I did not offend anyone who was going through grief.  I wanted to create a good support group for children to feel comfortable, open up, and keep their trust.  I feel many children are misunderstood with their feelings.  My goal is to continue Project H.E.A.L. for years to come.

C.     Resource Identification and Utilization:“Seeing death as the end of life is like seeing the horizon as the end of the ocean”. – David Searls 

I feel my project has been successful with the amount of support from the community.  My family has been my greatest support.  Because of my age, there are many things I cannot do like driving myself around.  Mrs. Debra Fleming is my coach and was my teacher for the two years while I was at Aikin Elementary.  She receives numerous phone calls from me trying to find out if I am doing something right.  Ed Catlin, Nancy Catlin and Pam Russell have been a great support by giving me inside knowledge of grief and how to approach it.  Crockett Middle School Staff has been a great support for this project especially when I wanted to pass out my surveys during Advisory period.  The teachers did not have to do it, but they did, and that helped me understand what is needed.  Some of the teachers and staff have gone far and beyond, like Mr. Craig Maxwell, to help me set up my blog site and podcast.  Mrs. Deborah Robbins has been there for every part of my project and at every support group meeting.  If I need copies made she does that for me even with her busy schedule.  I have many supporters from the community such the area churches, Immanuel Baptist Church – Pastor Randall Scott, Faith Presbyterian Church – Pastor John Kelley and Peace Lutheran Church – Mrs. Betty.  Starrett Funeral Home has opened the doors in a new way, and Mr. Arvin Starrett has helped me in more ways than I could have ever imagined, like helping me get my book published and having my grief awareness ribbons printed.  He has been working on getting the community more involved.  David Hanson, my scout leader and my Boy Scout Troop 3990 have helped me also.  They are always ready to step up when called.  Mr. David Hanson has helped greatly by donating money and by participating in the programs I do.  Mr. Chuck Pollard and Mr. Hanson are also helping me to work on my speaking skills.  Since I am very bashful, my talking is extremely quiet.  They come in every Monday for 45 minutes before my scout meeting to work with me.  I could also not have done my project with out our close family friends, Joel and Adrian Casey, the Petersen Family, Susan Nash, and Christopher Nash who have done every different task ever that has come up.  Paris City Council, Lamar County Judge Superville, Lamar County Commissioners, and Paris Regional Medical Center – Kristi Martin have given me support through the community.  The Paris News and Local Radio station 107.7 did great publicity for my project and helped express the awareness for children through their time of grief.  Without them, I would have a hard time being able to support Project H.E.A.L.

D.     Accomplishments:“Life is a series of experiences, each one of which makes us bigger, even though it is hard to realize this.  For the world was built to develop character, and we must learn that the setbacks and griefs which we endure help us in our marching onward.” – Henry Ford 

I started the first support group at Crockett Middle School after Mrs. Robins and I went through the surveys and chose the students we felt needed the most help.  So far all the meetings have had positive results with all the students in the group looking forward to our next meeting.  I have written and illustrated a children’s book that I am getting published, and I am also passing the book out to the schools, hospitals, funeral homes, and the cancer treatment center, just to name a few places. The book (A Boy Named Sam) is about a boy whose grandpa dies from cancer, and how he deals with the different emotions and feelings he experienced. The next thing I did was create a safe blog site for children to talk about their feelings. One of my biggest accomplishments for myself was presenting to civic groups with confidence and gaining knowledge from it. I have also created an Awareness Ribbon as well as an Awareness Bracelet that I plan to distribute to my community.  Last, but not least, I have had  booths at our community events to get the word out, which in return has also given me confidence in talking and presenting my project.  I have distributed 3,780 brochures, 845 bookmarks, 200 library references, and 450 business cards through out the community.  I have collected $762 through fundraising (CiCi Pizza and Applebee’s), as well as donations from the Immanuel Baptist Church Adult Class, Grief Ministries, Wal-mart, Office Max, Hanson Electric, Rotary Club, Hobby Lobby, Starrett Funeral Home and Honda of Paris.

E.     Reflection on Project Outcomes:“I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge - myth is more potent than history - dreams are more powerful than facts - hope always triumphs over experience - laughter is the cure for grief - love is stronger than death” –Robert Fulghum 

The response for my project from the community was very surprising.  In my opinion, I did not think I would get as much support as I did. Starting withCrockett
Middle School, then reaching out into the community has gotten a lot of people to understand the need for my project and how it is going to help children. I have presented my project to several places including; the Kiwanis Club, the