Holidays can be hard times for grieving families. The season is filled with family get-togethers and festive events, many of which grievers are accustomed to sharing with the person who died. Surrounded by holiday “cheer,” the pain of loss can seem overwhelming. Sometimes, a simple “Happy Holidays!” from a well-meaning friend can send you into a tailspin. It’s hard to “put on a happy face” when you’re grieving inside. 

For the newly bereaved, Christmas, Hanukkah, New Years and other traditional holidays may be especially difficult. You might see the perfect gift for a loved one, and then realize he or she is not here to enjoy it.   Whether your grief is new or old, there are ways you can make the holidays more bearable and less fatiguing for you and your children. You may also discover ways to honor the memory of the person who died and to begin new meaningful traditions in the family. Here are some suggestions. Take what is helpful for you.

Acknowledge the Life of the person Who Died. There are many creative ways to honor a person’s memory during the holidays. You may wish to do so by carrying on your family traditions or by creating new ones. Here are some ideas: o Buy or make a memorial candle to light during the evening throughout the holiday seasono Observe a moment of silence or prayer before a holiday meal (or at another appropriate time) in honor of the person who diedo Make a special toast or share memories of the person who diedo Buy a gift in honor of your loved oneMake a donation to a charity in the name of your loved one or help a family in need by making a holiday meal for them or sending presents to their children.Remember: There is no right or wrong way to “handle” a holiday. Some may wish to keep family traditions while others choose to change them. Everyone grieves differently. Honor yourself and your grieving. Have a peaceful holiday.