Summer Activities
Activity One:
Depending on the age of the child, watch and discuss one of the following videos: “What on Earth Do You Do When Someone Dies,” for the youngest children ages eight and under, “Akeelah & the Bee,” ages 9-12, and “Bridge to Terabithia” for adolescents or The Harry Potter series which is suited for children ages 9 and older. Each video is age-appropriate and has underlying themes of death loss and grief. While watching with the child, consider questions to ask them and the discussion you can have, but don’t expect a long conversation. The movie themes and those of your conversation can be raised at appropriate moments throughout the next few days and weeks.
Activity Two:
Create a family flag that represents your family’s grief journey. Use sail cloth or similar material, cut to the desired size, and hem and sew one seam along the edge for the flagpole to slide through. You can also add grommets if you like. Embellish with small jeweled items, small lightweight fabric, feathers and paint, though remind the child that this flag represents your grief journey as a family and should incorporate hope for the future. The activity is a loose interpretation of Tibetan Prayer flags, which some believe give wisdom, compassion, and strength and promote peace and harmony for all beings.
Activity Three:
Purchase small terra-cotta pots. Your family can either work on one collaborative pot, or give each family member an individual pot. Carefully break (though do not shatter), the pot. Using paint pens, have members write how they feel about being alone in their grief on the inside of the broken pieces, and write or draw the sources of support on the outside of the pieces. Work together to piece the pot back together using glue and incorporate the analogy that when a significant death occurs, ones heart breaks.
Activity Four:
Purchase mid-size hand mirrors with handles. Provide sharpies, glue, yarn and a few embellishments. Have the child or family member identify feelings they share with the world and –write on one side of the mirror (usually the mirrored side). Then identify the feelings they hide from the world and write on the other side of the mirror. Explain children and adults are sometimes afraid of being judged by others, so they protect themselves by only sharing certain parts of their personality or feelings. This is often referred to as “wearing masks.” Help child identify who they can share their feelings with including the ones they identify on the underside of their mirror.
Activity Five:
Consider purchasing a special bell with a beautiful tone and presenting to your child in a special bag or box. Explain to the child that whenever they are feeling alone, they can ring the bell in honor of their loved one and they may “feel” their loved ones presence.
Activity Six:
Identify fun, interactive ways to engage children and help them understand the benefits of physical activity, including ways to release frustration or anger. Play fruit ball, a simple and fun game that allows children to smash fruit and vegetables as they are tossed instead of using a softball or baseball. Consider using slightly spoiled items or citrus from trees. Tomatoes, apples, oranges, grapefruit, bell peppers and potatoes all work great. It can be a bit messy, though kids love it and if you’re an adult you’ll be surprised how much you love it as well!
Activity Seven:
Collect “clean’ trash and lay out along with duct tape, plastic wrap, foil, scissors and glue. Set the stage by asking the child if they have ever heard the term “emotional garbage” (you might be surprised how many have), and even if they haven’t, they can almost always can make a connection between the term and grief. Make an analogy between real garbage and emotional garbage. Emotional garbage can include feelings that can inhibit or “get in they way” of their grief journey including self-blame or guilt.
Work together to create “sculptured junk” and consider writing small tags with different types of emotional garbage to be attached to the sculpture. Help kids identify ways to cope with emotional garbage and talk about how you each felt when creating your masterpiece.
Other ideas for activities are:
· Writing or drawing spontaneously on mural paper taped to the wall· Creating a collage using pictures and words cut from old magazines
· Constructing a book that can be used as a journal or a memory book· Writing a poem, eulogy or song
· Launching a balloon after writing messages to the person who died (Use biodegradable balloons and clip the string for environmental reasons.)Going on a field trip to a funeral home, cemetery, etc.
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